I stop getting paid at 4:30pm. Anything I do after that is for love. And I don’t love you. Not one bit. I don’t even like you. Why do you call me at 4:29 and ask for help then? The problem started at 10 this morning. Why do you complain to everyone around you and not to anyone who can help you? Why call now? at 4:29? on a Friday? Better yet, why do I decide to help? Who knows?
I come up to your office. It smells funny. The keyboard is grubby. The helpdesk noob is on the phone to you from America. I look how long he has been on the line. 43 minutes. *sigh*.
Me: Okay Cesar, forward the job ticket to me, I ‘ll take care of it.
Helpdesk noob: OK BYE!
In 5 minutes I have fixed his stupid browser. Why did he have netscape installed? Why it came with AOL of course! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH AOL in New Zealand?!? Apparently it’s cool and you have to pay for it monthly and you get email. Ahuh? well gmail and hotmail and whatever are free. *clickety click* DELETED!
Run spybot it kills a billion spys. Or is it Spies? *clickety clickety click* all fixed. Your computer is now going to download the updates and apply them. You have to do nothing. What if I…? NO! you no touchy!
And then I notice the connection. it keeps dropping off. The downloads will have to be watched and restarted manually every time! Can I trust mr IWAQ-who-calls-at-4:29 to do this? ummmmm no! okay I will watch it until it is done. Time goes on. and on and on.
5:30 Rolls around. I jump up. I AM LEAVING! mr IWAQ, you will have to restart it manually *start explaining using small words how to restart the download* OKAY?
Yeah okay can you give me your number so I can call you tomorrow morning?
umm. NO! I DO NOT WORK WEEKENDS! THEY ARE MINE! ALL MINE! MY SACRED TIME! HOW DARE YOU!? I SHOULD STRIKE YOU DOWN WHERE YOU STAND! What I actually said was, no, I am sorry I can’t help you tomorrow, I am going to be really busy. I will catch up with you on Monday morning. BYE!
Woohoo I am outta there! I jump in the car and home sweet home! YAY JOY OVERWHELMING!
Waaaahoooooo!
