I get bored sometimes

When I get bored at work I send emails around to everyone one our floor. This particular day I was a little cheesed off because usually people don’t wash their dishes in the kitchenette thingy at work and there are so few dishes and cutlery it causes issues. Also, I hid my name with Xxxxx. I want this blog to be semi anonynmous – meaning I don’t want workmates finding out about it incase feelings are hurt etc. However, if you’re determined or I slip up, you’ll probably find out my real name anyway. I just don’t wanna be blatant about it.

EMAIL 1 begin

And it came to pass that the Xxxxx was hungry. And now behold, he went forth to the kitchen thingy to partake of some food yea, Weet Biscuits. Now, behold, it came to pass that as the Xxxxx was journeying to the kitchen, behold he could not find a bowl wherewith to prepare the Weet Biscuits. “Oh woe is me!” He lamented. Being a smart yet humble man, he decided to work with what was there. Perhaps a cup?

cup

Nay, a cup will not do. After a lot of rummaging, behold a bowl was discovered. Indeed it was a fine bowl. Behold the bowl had flowers on it. Being humble, the Xxxxx accepted the bowl with flowers on it and hoped none of his friends saw.

flower

And behold, it came to pass that the Xxxxx was joyous, for behold, he had a bowl. But his joy was not full, yea, he still lacked a spoon. The Xxxxx started to rummage again. Behold, there were plenty of knives, 2 forks and behold, 1 spoon.

spoon

Now this spoon was used by the entire 1^st floor, so therefore the Xxxxx did cleanse it thoroughly. And it came to pass that at this time, the Xxxxx’s joy was full, yea for he had a bowl and a spoon!

And now, it came to pass that as the Xxxxx was partaking of the food, he lamented on the lack of bowls and spoons but was ever grateful for the bowl and spoon he had received and promptly washed and dried and packed the bowl and spoon away in order for the next user to use. Because that is just the kinda guy he is.

EMAIL 1 END

The situation did not change much, people still did not wash dishes and cutlery and dishes are an ongoing problem. A few weeks later I sent this one around.

EMAIL 2 START

And now it came to pass that the Xxxxx did hunger again. Behold, he went forth to the kitchen thingy again to eat. And now, the source of his sustenance was HOME BRAND for he did not have many senines to spare.

weet

And it came to pass that as he went forth he did obtain a bowl, but then he began to despair saying, “Oh that I had a spoon! I desire a spoon and I have none! Wo wo wo unto me!” And this was the manner of his lamenting. And it came to pass that while he was thus lamenting, he spied a spoon. But the spoon which he spied was most filthy. And it was mixed in with other dirtiness.

dirty

Now it did pass into his mind that he could cleanse and purify the spoon, however it is not meet that he should do so. Behold, to do so would prevent proper repentance for the naughtyness that caused this. Therefore he went forth and partook of a cheap substitute, yeah a false spoon.

plastic

And it came to pass that as the Xxxxx was using this false spoon, it did cut his lip  ever so slightly. Not as much as to kill the Xxxxx, but small enough to cause pain. And the Xxxxx was sad.

As the Xxxxx sadly washed his bowl after partaking of the sustenance, he reflected on the situation. He had been happy to find a bowl without flowers on it this time. But his happiness had turned to sorrow when he could not find the one spoon, yea, the spoon used by the entire floor. Using the false spoon was not rewarding yea, it caused much sorrow and a cut lip.

EMAIL 2 END

The next day there was new cutlery, YAY! my peacful protest yielded results.